B. 5/10/13

So, it’s a little sad that our first blog post of the “new year” is in May, but at least I have no problem admitting that I am not an overachiever in any way, shape, or form  😀

Why now, you may ask?  Honestly, because I’m currently writing my last ever paper in my academic career (if you can call it that!) and it’s harder than you’d think…I’m avoiding it/thinking of different words that I can use so that I don’t sound like a fucking broken record.  Damn papers!

I guess there are other things on my mind as well though and it’s frustrating to not be able to write or say or feel the right words.  What are the right words and why wasn’t I ever given them?  Maybe that’s me being pessimistic at this point in my life but it’s really hard not to be that way sometimes.  Maybe we all just need to learn to be content with where we are in our lives by being honest with ourselves/where we are in this lifelong thing/those closest to us?  I don’t know—I’m no psychologist or psychiatrist or any other -ist that gives me the right to say what things are supposed to be or how things are supposed to be but I think the best that we can each do is try.  We need to try to be alright with ourselves and where our own lives are currently and where they are heading.  We need to try to our best not to compare ourselves with what our friends are doing or to what’s socially acceptable for us to be doing and just be.    It gets frustrating that there are so many expectations for us millennial’s and that many of them are unrealistic.  I’m not saying all of them are unrealistic but I don’t think that many of them work for everyone at all points in life.  For instance, I’ve been having some boy-stalker (not quite the restraining order sense, but annoying) issues lately which tells me that, unlike many people my age, a personal/romantic-esque relationship is not quite in my cards right now.  Not saying that something won’t happen sometime in the future to change that but this makes me not fit into that certain expectation.  On the other hand, I’m getting a second college degree at quite a young age (though a “real” job would be nice soon) within the next month-ish and I guess that makes me fit into a different expectation of our generation.

I guess we just have to take what we can get?

Holy shit this sounds stupid and preachy!  That was not my intent at all—sometimes I just feel the need to tell someone (I guess this is what I’ve got right now) what I’m thinking and if this is in any way offensive I sincerely apologize.  Damn expectations of not sounding stupid and preachy!! 😀

Now don’t you feel better?


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