B. I don’t know what the fuck the day is…

I’m a little tipsy–sometimes it’s a little easier to be tipsy than sober.  I just wish I could get courage from this intoxication and say what I should say to people to properly stick up for myself but I think about others when I’m tipsy too.  Damn my niceness!  I want this horrible feeling of shitty-ness to all end sometime soon but that would require so much more alcohol and, quite frankly, I don’t think my bladder can handle that much more liquid.  I think it’s easier to be tipsy because I don’t know what to decide for my life–and it also makes me feel just a smidgen less lonely.  OH, LONELY!  How I will forever hate you more than any other thing!  Seriously, anything!  Like a million times worse than sunburn….and I really, REALLY HATE SUNBURN.  Alright, I gotta pee.

Now don’t you feel better?